Guided Struggle

I really struggled to get on my mat today. And once there, I struggled again to be present, at all. I wanted to be elsewhere (in bed sleeping mostly). I was adamantly against doing any of the yoga routines I usually use when I’m distracted. So instead I chose a guided meditation. Just mindfulness meditation, really focusing on the breath, to the exclusion of pretty much everything else, except the physical sensations of the body. Hmmm, that sounds familiar…

I listened to the entire 20 minute meditation. About 15 minutes in, although I was still listening to the guide and focusing on my breath, I found that I had started to move. Off my cushion and onto the floor for cat/cow, then Sphinx pose for a few moments. That’s where I was when the meditation ended and it seemed exactly right to me. I kept moving, focused on my breath. Low lunges, down dog, heart-to-earth. Whatever felt good. I ended in the same seared posture I began in.

And everything was exactly right.

Yoga doesn’t always look the way it is portrayed in media. Sometimes it’s about listening to your heartbeat and letting that be the force that moves you.

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